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I left! I got distracted by Birthdays and jobs and sleeping and all those things that get in the way of the VITAL job of telling a small group of people online about my skin condition.

I was 27 this week, I mean I was 26, now I am 27 – I feel like I’ve crossed some kind of bracket into another checkbox whenever I fill in a form. ’27-30′ oh dear.

Anyway, skin. Things have been okay ish, I’ve been avoiding gluten since I’ve decided that’s what makes me worse – I always kind of avoid most things being vegan, so I expect my liver is like some kind of palace – but yes, gluten-free, although my skin took a weird turn this week and I had to scrabble around to find some gluten to blame, it could have been in the malt vinegar crisps I ate but didn’t check:\, or excitingly, it could be in the Aveeno I apply all over me every day! 

so yes, that happened, it hasn’t been terrible but I have caved in a couple of times and turned the shower up SUPER hot, I know it hurts afterwards and it sucks all the moisture out of me, but for those 7 minutes of scalding my whole body at once it feels incredible! Please don’t do it! But my god. I need to work on stopping that habit – its particularly easy to do on my legs – since they dont twist and articulate as much as my arms/torso I can get away with abusing them much more. Sorry legs.

ALSO, this week I finally got to see a dermatologist, she took a bloody test, was totally cool and helpful and sympathetic, and in the end recommended I buy industrial size Aveeno with a special voucher for cheapness – and I use steroids once a week, for a bit. To clear me up. I got booked in for a patch test too but that’s not until Sept. Sigh.

I really don’t want to go ahead with the steroids so I think I’m going to bail out on them and keep on with this long-term unproven TSW thing, and hope that come Sept the skin test says i’m allergic to a thing, and if i stop eating the thing, I will improve. I just need to know, you know? No progress picture this time because I am nursing an unusually awful graze I scratched into me in my sleep, doesn’t feel like progress! but apart from that month 3 has been the easiest so far!

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Okay, so having a bit of an itchy time shouldn’t be compared to hell..I agree.

Because hell isn’t real, and my itchy skin is.

I’m 26, I live in London, England, I have a full time job, a fiance, and a skin condition. It’s taken me over a quarter of a century to find out what’s wrong with my body, and I think it’s TSW, and this post is it the start of me documenting how coming off them works. I figured it might help some people to read, but most importantly; it’d help me to write. 

To put this in context (briefly!): I’ve had eczema since I was a kid, and brilliantly learned in my early teens, that splashing on a little Betnovate, Eumovate, Hydrocortisone etc. would keep my skin looking sparkly and nice. Not doing this made my face and inside elbows (inbows?) awful and rank. I diligently applied this, with encouragement and praise form my Doctor/s, for about ten years. and everything was fine. Up until two years ago I was still doing it – if I knew I had a date coming up or a time where people would be around I would buy a tube and use it the week before to clear my skin up. 

Anyway, like everyone else the steroids slowly stopped working – my whole body got bad, the doctor’s told me to use more, and I refused. so as it stands right now (and as I start this blog) I’ve been off steroids for about a month, I’ve been vegan for about 2 years, and I’m due to see a doctor in June for a skin allergy test.

My theory is that if the allergy test says i’m allergic to wheat or sugar (pretty much the only things left to cut out) then awesome, i’ll cut them out, but my skin doesn’t feel like an allergy is causing it – like everyone else I have the same red torso/white hands, and the same weeping hot skin, the same constant sadness at how terrible I look, I haven’t been to the gym for about 6 months and my appearance is making me desperately sad. 

I’m hoping my journey won’t last too long, and I’m hoping TSW is real and that it will fix my skin, because its affecting every part of my life, i’m a lot less productive at work, at lot less patient with stuff, a LOT more anti-social, and a lot less attentive in my relationship – which is the most important thing in the world, and neglecting the girl I want to marry because I can’t function normally due to relentless sore discomfort is killing me.Image